In Terra Pax

Intro to the Story: During my year living in England when I was completing my MA in Writing degree, one of the modules that I took concerned memoirs, travel writing and other forms that “crossed borders”. This work below came from one of our first assignments where we had to “borrow” bits and pieces from already existing texts and make them into something new. As you will see, I wove together lines from some of my favorite stories and songs to create a whole new work from my Gothic imagination. Among my “borrowings”, you will find snippets of Poe’s infamous poem “The Raven”, Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol”, Caroll’s “Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland” and Simon and Garfunkel’s immortal song “The Sound of Silence”. You have been warned!

I remember walking out once to discover the truth about humanity and life itself. The images conjured up still leave me unclear as to what their purpose was for, or why I alone was privy to the visions I am about to relate to you. It was just moments ago when my sojourn had ended and I feel that the need to put pen to paper is so great, or else I shall not remember all that transpired. I sense the hour draw near and it all comes back to me again, stalking me like a lover scorned. The hourglass tipped, drained full into its base. Creeping like a spider, I cannot escape or conceal what I have seen.

It was in the bitter bleak midwinter of December when I found myself outside. I saw two children huddling together by a scarcely lit fire by the wayside. I looked around but nowhere were parents to be found. No stones to guide them back to the comforts of a home now forgotten.

The boy and girl, for that is what they looked like, looked so cold that their skin also seemed to reflect back the glowing snow that lay about their frozen bare feet.

They were wholly ragged, scowling and wolfish in appearance, more like devils lurking in the dark than angels in their graceful youth. They glared out menacingly with Doomsday written upon their brows, pronouncing it all to the human race.

“We are Man’s,” they seemed to whisper through every thread of their worn and ragged personas. I did not want to look upon them but was so drawn in by their inescapable power, I could not resist. They were devoid of the want that was so keenly felt at this season of the year, cast out by the ignorance of those that knew not of love’s true embraces.  

They did not speak words, only mutter under their breaths, quivering in the cold. Their voices mingling with the wind, the wind, the heavenly wind shouting, “Beware them both!” and dying away, with nothing more to be said. I continued on, turning up my collar to bleed into my now cold and damp neck. When I looked back to see them, the children were gone. I hustled away from that haunted place as fast I could go with the snow starting to fall lightly, covering up any trace I was even there. 

I beheld a city, darkened, that sprang up from all around me. With one foot in front of the other, I took to traversing its narrow streets and cobblestones constructed in another time and another place. I stumbled all the way, trying to find some semblance of reality to cling to. Nothing was in its place, nothing was familiar pushing through that labyrinth, all mum’s the word. I crawled through its lanes, alleyways, and dipped into corner after corner after corner. Onward, every now and then punctuated by the flash of neon lights – A, B and C – splitting the night with occasional halos of street lamps presenting themselves without comfort. Every tower of the city was shrouded in shadow, their tall outlines barely made visible against the infinite night sky.

I tried darting back the way I came, desperate in the hope of seeing something I recognized. A bell stuck Twelve, midnight. My heart jolted out of my chest with every clang that reverberated through the lonely streets. Echoing on until its death.

Suddenly, I felt a presence close by, almost eating away at my thoughts. I turned to face forward again. And there the figure stood.

It was difficult to detach it from the surrounding darkness that lay about me, but there it stood. Or rather it hovered above the ground of its own accord. No sound did it utter. Its silence, that of the silence that lingered once the chimes had run their course. 

All it once it shifted. And gravely and silently it approached me. I felt myself go limp and my back almost gave way. My mind responded likewise and congealed, frozen to the spot.

It seemed to take me in with some regard, twisting its head to observe me, and lingered for a moment. For some reason, I remember it was a hooded being, its heavy gown enveloping all parts of its body, flowing towards the ground and converging with the rising mist that formed about it.

It wavered, shrank and melted into the night that lay restless about us. Then it was no more.

I blinked once.

I blinked twice, and my head tossed about.

In place of the phantom’s hood and dress, there revealed itself a bedpost, one of four that lay in a solemn chamber. That of my own.

I recoiled at the sight of it. The bed was bare, un-curtained. Under its sheet lay a something covered up which announced itself in a most awful language.

I had not the power to lift up its contents and so left the place from out a nearby window. It stretched and molded itself over completely, providing a solid path for me to walk upon. Just as my foot touched the pavement, I suddenly fell through a now gaping opening, down, down, down and landed hard on another barren earth.

There were small stones everywhere, protruding from the sepulchral dirt that spread out unceasing in all directions. I strolled, glancing over them as grey monoliths materialized out of the fog and winged beings cried out in silent glory or terror, I did not know which.

A lantern flicker caught my eye and I crept towards its dismal source. A group was assembled, humble and forlorn. Three of their party were finishing digging out what appeared to be a shallow resting place for some forsaken soul. One that had left this life for the next with only a few to watch its parting.

I felt the urge to come closer, compelled to do so by some unnamed force. The people did not notice, with their faces turned down, some hidden in veils with black-laced parasols over their heads. Creeping forward, I had come within an inch or two of the opening into the ground. Standing so close, the assembly had the appearance of a darkly hidden masquerade in some Dickensian setting.

All that transpired next was in rapid motion- the casket lowered, last words spoken and all disappearing into the ensuing fog with smoky entrails in their wake.

I stood facing the upraised marker, wanting to know its namesake. I thought of cold, rigid, dreadful Death set upon that altar with its natural revealing of our state of mortal dominion. My body shivered, thinking of the great beyond and the fate that await all mortals in the end.  

When I approached, all lay quiet around me. It was not the menacing silence that emanated from the children or the dark city that lay behind me somewhere. No, it was a new, fresh kind of silence that spread around as snow began to fall again in its little feather currents. And I was there alone. Just me, and the words written on that stone. Forever chiseled. And I nodded in acknowledgement as to what they had to say. In Terra Pax. Peace on Earth.

That’s when I found myself back home - in the comfort of an armchair merely napping. With my books surrounding me in their narrow bookcases, and the bust of a famous deity sitting above my chamber door, I dashed off to write everything down that I just related to you. I wonder still: had it been a dream, as all that we see or seem but in reality, a dream, or had it actually happened? I do not know nor wish to explain it all away as simply a trifling fantasy. I know that the ghosts will forever haunt me, even in my waking reality, but, somehow, I take heart in these dark delusions. For Death is not the end, but the beginning into a new life. And along the way, we will make some Peace on Earth for ourselves and for all of mankind. That is the real truth about humanity and life itself.